


Unrequited

by dNwfvBj9



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: M/M, One-sided Shizaya, Raijin Days
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:35:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27694214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dNwfvBj9/pseuds/dNwfvBj9
Summary: Izaya leans his chair back and smiles without meaning to. It doesn’t reach his eyes but why would it? That would defeat the point.
Relationships: Kishitani Shinra/Orihara Izaya
Kudos: 22





	Unrequited

**Izaya**

The classroom is empty, the evening sun starting to bleed red through the windows. 

At his desk, Shinra is smiling, tapping a pen against his desk as he hums a tune that’s sorely tone deaf. Izaya is there too, and he finds himself wanting to wipe the smile off Shinra’s face. It’s difficult to provoke Shinra, but Izaya wants to try, if only to prove he can.

It doesn’t take a genius to guess that Shinra is thinking of Celty, not with that placid smile of his. Izaya leans his chair back and smiles without meaning to. It doesn’t reach his eyes but why would it? That would defeat the point.

“Shinra, you seem happy,” Izaya says, his voice light. Purposely so, like he doesn’t care. 

Shinra turns to face him, beaming as he does. “Oh, I am!” he says. “After all, I’m thinking of my dear Celty, and when I think of her, I’m always happy!”

Izaya can’t be surprised but his smile cracks all the same. He’s always found Shinra amusing, but it’s only when he’s speaking about Celty that Izaya finds him _annoying_. But he likes Shinra enough and he doesn’t care about Celty, so what could it be? He refuses to think about it.

Still, he speaks, lacing his words with something - not poison, but something Izaya hopes will hurt.

“Of course. Your _beloved_ ,” Izaya says. “Though I wonder if you can call her that.” He twists his words, hoping it’ll hurt like a knife. “She won’t return your “love,” not with the way you are.” Izaya tilts his head, pretending to think. “You try too hard, Shinra,” he says, a mocking lilt in his voice.

To his surprise, Shinra’s smile only widens. “I suppose I do! I’ll do anything for love, after all!” Shinra’s glasses catch the light, his eyes obscured by the sunset. “Besides, it’s not like you don’t try either. I’ve seen the way you look at Shizuo!”

Izaya blinks, and for a moment, he’s stunned. An agonizing second passes before he can speak again. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Whatever you say!” Shinra says. “I just think it’s sad that you try even harder than me, but he won’t love you back, not in the way you want him to.”

A chill runs through Izaya. “He’s a _monster_ ,” he hisses. _I don’t love monsters_ , he’d say, but he can’t bring himself to deny it. It’s one of the things he hates about himself. 

He’s in front of Shinra now, hands clenched and nails digging into his palms. He almost doesn’t remember walking over. “Take it back.”

“I don’t see why I should.” Shinra raises an eyebrow. “It’s the truth and if you don’t like that, then change it. Try someone else.”

It’s a careless thing to say, so of course Shinra would say it. “Like who?” Izaya says, allowing irritation to creep into his voice. He doesn’t like this conversation. Things feel distant between them, but at the same time, too close for comfort. The setting sun illuminates the room, crystallizing the tension between them. Izaya lets himself hope and it’s as terrible as he thought it’d be. It’s alright, nothing matters when it’s the two of them.

“You?” 

* * *

**Shinra**

And Shinra looks into Izaya’s eyes and thinks, _how transparent_. 

Shinra would be lying if he said he didn’t expect this. Izaya Orihara is not hard to read, not when Shinra knows what to look for. It’s obvious that he’s lonely, why else would he speak so much of humanity? Shinra understands how it is. He might not love humanity as Izaya does, but he loves Celty just as much. And it’s always lonely to love. 

It’s been a fun conversation. Shinra rests his chin in one hand, thinking over Izaya’s words.

Izaya’s not bad. He has a pretty face and he’s not unpleasant to be around. Shinra likes talking to him - he likes how Izaya tries to get under his skin in ways that don’t matter at all. He might even call him his best friend. No doubt it’s the same for Izaya too, even if he denies it. 

As the silence stretches between them, it’s easy to tell that Izaya wants out. As much as he tries to seem unaffected, he’s painfully easy to read. Shinra likes that part of him. His favourite thing about Izaya is how he's the only one who can see through him. It makes him special. 

So he tilts his head and folds his hands. “Sure,” he says. “That would be interesting.” 

_Interesting_ because he knows what Izaya’s hoping for and he can’t give him that much. Part of him feels bad about it and wishes he could. But Celty will always be number one in his heart, and he won’t ever betray her, not even with Izaya. Still, he wants Izaya by his side. 

Shinra might not love Izaya, but he likes him. Maybe they can work things out. 

(Back then, he took a knife and Izaya took the fall, and maybe that’s enough of a reason.)


End file.
